“We are afraid to care too much, for fear that the other person does not care at all.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
I don’t know how many of you are like me – you see someone that needs caring for and your maternal instinct just. kicks. in. It doesn’t matter who the person is, how close you are to them, or how they treat you – if they need your help you’ll just be there because it defies every being of who you are NOT to take care of them.
Maybe this is not something that everyone relates to – but to those that have the maternal/paternal instinct i know you know what i mean?
Now have you been through that frustration of growing to care so much for a single person who just doesn’t seem to take your care seriously? It’s unnerving and hurtful. It makes you want to just stop caring, but yet you can’t. Is there something as caring too much? Is there a limit when we need to just stop? Or should we just go on.
Logically, in a such cost-benefit-analysis world where we would only want to do something for our own selfish reason why should we even care at all? ESPECIALLY if the person you are caring for doesn’t seem to appreciate your care. If it’s painful, why do we need to suffer right? Well yes some people might say that.
BUT, I am a sole believer of showing all the love I have for someone (in whatever form it is) no matter what. Sometimes, this world is too selfish, too self-centered, too independent, too proud, to show their emotions to show how human we are. At the very centre of humanity is community-living. We are made to help each other.
Think about it. What exactly are our lives defined by? We are defined by the relationships we build with other people. We don’t technically exist (well ok except maybe by official records) without the definition of a relationship. By us knowing another person, other people know of our existence. We all live in an interconnected network of interactions. So why are we trying to cut ourselves off from others? Why are we trying to fight for what we want alone when we can do it with other people? Why do we shut off the love other people give?
I personally don’t feel it is necessary to be alone. The more love and affection you show to other people (be it friends, family, lover) the more you strengthen that bond and relationship.
It may seem naive to suggest that you should continue to care for someone that doesn’t seem to care but what if they just can’t show it? What if your care is the only thing motivating them to fight on? After all, we don’t know the extent to our own actions of caring. All we know is the care that we give. I personally think – don’t underestimate it. It can mean a lot.
Fight through the pain and the hurt of rejection, abandonment and lack of love from the person when they are not appreciative. Even if they don’t appreciate it, it gives an example to other people. This way, it might inspire others to do the same – to spread the love and care to others when they might not initially have the courage to do so.
So my conclusion would be that “No – there is no such thing as caring too much”. Remember what Mother Theresa said “I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.” Spread the love in this world that needs more love to all. Never be afraid to show how much you care because love has never been a weakness only a strength – if not for yourself, then for others.
“Some people’s weakness is that they care too much; `it is also their strength.” – Brigitte Nicole
Follow your heart. Find your passion ❤️